I’m leaving on a jet plane.
But I’ll be back in a week. I’m sure Steph will keep your interest piqued in the meantime.
ONLY TWO MONTHS LEFT!!!!!!
I hope I can relax a little, yikes…
Friends and family, we are pleased to announce a new venue for our reception!
Even though we had our hearts set on the rehearsal space @ LiveArts, we were unable to afford proper tenting for the terrace area. Tenting is a very lucrative business apparently, and we were quoted a price near to the cost of the reception space, tables and service; the rental; the food, and the help for such a feat. Uh, no.
I mention the above, because we were just going to chance it that it wouldn’t rain… in order to have seating for everyone, we needed to use the terrace. Thankfully Steph’s parents finally made us see the error of our ways.
Anyway, we met with the parish wedding co-ordiantor and the parish administrator to go over the logistics of the hall. I’ll just say that we are really excited! Steph was pumping out amazing ideas left and right, and the space is going to host an amazing reception.
I also just wanted to mention how amazing LiveArts has been throughout all of this. We dithered on the date about 80098 times. We were constantly calling with little details and last-minute questions; all met with aplomb. To top in all of, they even returned our deposit! Big round of applause.
Won't be looking this good.
Friends, I wish you could have been there.
After telling the best John Bobbit joke I’d ever heard, the sweaty, fat man languidly undid his shirt, nigh down to his navel…
Last Friday Steph and I made a appointment at the Men and Boy’s Shop, to pick out tux styles and obtain my measurements. This is the traditional suit store on the Downtown Mall. It is something like out of a Walker Percy novel. Or it was something out of Walker Percy novel. I guess the Southern gentleman just wears khakis and an extra-large golf polo now. Once upon a time, dressing nicely, properly, involved knowing certain rules and etiquette, but also encouraged a certain aesthetic understanding. And dressing nicely was never out of the box. While dandism always existed, dressing nice wasn’t something foreign and absurd; it was an emblem of the type of man you were.
The proprietor was really putting the hard sell on us to stay away from Men’s Wearhouse and the Mall. He also was explaining everything. When I asked him about ascots, he brightened up a bit and gave me a little more credit. Then he undid his shirt, chest-hair akimbo, and stuff several down his shirt. I hadn’t really understood that the ascot is usually tucked, into the shirt, making it hard to wear with a tux.
After a fewmore salty jokes, a bunch more sartorial wisdom dispensed, and jackets jackets jackets, we were able to pick a look we liked.
We all will be wearing classic slim-fit three-button black tuxes. The Groomsman will be wearing silver-grey vests with matching European ties (the ties that are usually rented out are pre-tied. I made sure this is not the case with us! Ghastly!). I’ll be wearing a dark marine blue vest with an amazing bow tie striped with all the colors of our wedding.
Sadly, I was not able to learn how to tie said bow tie. I tired and failed three times in the store, bearing heaps and heaps of disdain from all present. After I got home, I watched every how-to video on the web and tried on and of for an hour. FAIL.
Steph taught herself intuitively in about 7 minutes.
According to my calculations, using the 20-25% rule of thumb, our final count should be right around the 160 mark.
But let’s make it interesting, shall we? Leave your guess of attendee numbers in the comments, and we’ll have some sort of prize for the visitor that comes the closest*.
*Many will play, few will win.
We’re working through the details of the reception and one of the things I’m looking forward to the most is dancing with so many of my friends. Contrary to popular belief, JWF and I will not be performing a Wedding “Evolution of Dance”. But how fun would it be to have everyone break out into a Bollywood-style “disco” number? Any takers?
I went to the post office on my way into work this morning! Mailed all the invitations off!
The postman was an older kind and cheerful gentleman. He was also very congratulatory. He weighed an invitation and he confirmed that we were *more than OK* with the postage. I was a bit worried about this since we only had placed one stamp on each envelope. He said that he thought our invitations were really nice and simple, and made a comment to me about how he thinks that out of all the things in the world one could worry about, invitations should be last on the list…that he thinks the simpler they are, the better. It was funny because I didn’t tell him anything about wedding planning or about us. But I could tell by his knowing look and tone of voice he probably has a daughter or son who got married and went through all the rigmarole of making and mailing invitations.
Anyhow it was nice exchange and pleasant experience and I am so glad we mailed them out!
Last night was our shower, hosted by the Gum’s at their awesome house. It was so interesting to see various world collide as our friends and family met one another. The food was amazing, and we enjoyed fresh mint julep’s concocted by our friend Amy. To our surprise we had a time of public gift opening. Emily hadn’t really planned for this to be part of the evening, and I didn’t really know the protocol. I deferred to James, who doesn’t like opening presents in front of others; he vetoed the opening. However, a quick informal poll did reveal that the guests were clamoring for it, so we acquiesced.
Before we began, someone suggested that everyone go around the circle and tell they first met me and/or James. This wasn’t a tacky game; it just sort of happened very organically. It was so incredibly moving! I was tearing up at almost every story, and when James told his version of “our story,” the tears were really flowing! The consensus was that God can work through any amount of time, space, doubt and circumstance to bring people together!
Bill Sublette, photographer extraordinaire, was in attendance, and snapped some great candids. Take a look at our Co-Ed Shower gallery.
Fast-forward. When I came into the kitchen today, James was unwrapping some of our new presents and organizing them. He appears to be more interested in what was on the boxes than in them though, judging by the way I found him:
I laughed so hard when I saw all the bows he tied to himself. It was even better watching him do a dance, but I only have this awesome photo to share in proof of the gift wrap costume.
I bet your grandma didn’t put New Yorker cartoons into your shower gift card.
Wikipedia sayeth:
The custom of the bridal shower is said to have grown out of earlier dowry practices when a poor woman’s family might not have the money to provide a dowry for her, or when a father refused to give his daughter her dowry because he did not approve of the marriage. In such situations, friends of the woman would gather together and bring gifts that would compensate for the dowry and allow her to marry the man of her choice. A frequently quoted legend traces the origin of this practice to sixteenth or seventeenth century the Netherlands. However there are also parallels with many dowry practices and the U.S. Colonial or hope chest (trousseau) custom.[1]
Well. Not only do I collect the “dowry” of a paid-in-full wedding reception, but I have also gotten the stamp-of-approval from said father. Of course, I am also getting to spend the rest of my life with my soul-mate. Here, a person of such overflowing goodness and beauty that some of those finer qualities can’t help but fall upon my beaten brow. I fail to see what further compensation is needed!
As it stands, I am somewhat anxious about the shower this evening… I do not usually seek the spotlight at parties (despite what my status as blogger might otherwise signify). I am worried that the guests may be bored, or find me a bore. I don’t like opening gifts in front of other people. I worry that my generally poor aesthetic tastes will finally be revealed to the world, as evidenced by my registry. I shall be exposed!
I guess that is really it. Some part of me feel guilty about demanding this kind of fuss and attention. My ever-lovelier B2B deserves every second of it of course, but do co-ed showers perhaps carry a whiff of pouty jealousy emanating from the groom?
I know, Googling for a normalcy check always makes me feel better. Lets see…
feeling so lucky!
Taking Your Future Husband to your shower is like dressing your dog in your clothes. They may not say anything but you know that it’s cruel.
I can’t think of a single guy I know who would want to go to a shower. There’s a reason that they’re traditionally women-only…
Do everyone a favor and don’t have a coed shower. I’ve been to 3 and dreaded every minute of them. Have a shower for her. And let the guys meet at a bar to drink or bowl
Another aspect of a coed shower is that is opens up lots of possibilities with regards to the nature of games that are played and the type of entertainment that is provided. The traditional stripper (male or female) is not really appropriate unless, perhaps, there is one of each sex.
The fact that the prospective bride and groom and friends and relatives from both sides can participate, makes the new tradition of he and she showers a really nice new ritual to explore.
Right.
Well, let’s do this. Please don’t mistake my mealy-mouthed introversion for ungratefulness. That would be far from the truth. I promise to leave any lingering uneasiness at the door and greet and receive with all the love and appreciation due to those present!
And, of course, shout-outs to my peeps the Gums for throwing what will no doubt be the co-ed wedding shower with a maladroit groom to beat for 2009!
almost this smooth
Pretty flowers from our garden
Apologies for the long break. The move is finally complete! My parents came down on Friday to help us unpack, clean, and organize. Yesterday we left town with our friends the Gum’s for a wonderful fourth of July picnic on a farm in Roanoke, Virginia. The food and company were awesome. Click “Read more” below to see more photos from the day.
What a weekend it was! I’m looking forward to some down time tonight. We are making asparagus risotto, rosemary chicken [for me], addressing the invitations and watching this.
Hello!
